Oh it's national news!!

But us Americans call it "summer."  Repeat after me, "summer" which is one of the four seasons believe it or not. 

I LOVE summer and am so happy it's warm except for sleeping. 

It's amazing that 70 something feels super super hot! I am talking bikini, shorts, tanks and flip flops daily! 

I am loving it and hope it stays for a few months as it will help with the shitty winter. 

Either way the summer now makes national news because its "red hot" lol I love it!

snow wife

Posh or a tool?

I personally think I sound like a tool...
Oh I don't mean in general but when I use British words for the sake of conversation or the person I am talking too. So I don't because I don't want to be a tool aka douchebag...
Example:
British person (BP): ohh I don't know if I can cut my fringe...
ME: I could never have bangs again because they take to long to grow out!

That is a prime example. Now if I would have said fringe it would be fake and awkward. That would make me a tool.
I feel you should only use words that come naturally, if you have to think, it sounds bad.
I do say knackered but that's natural as I use normally now but never fringe or petrol.

So be true to yourself or you are a tool aka douche.

snow wife

Hide it where?

Ok get your mind out of the gutter because I am not talking salami.

I am talking about tampons!
Almost all bathrooms here all have pedestal sinks and no cabinets. So where do you put your tampons and girly bits?

It blows my mind every time I look at houses. I always want to ask the woman,"excuse me where so you stash your tampons?". Haha

I mean it's bad enough I have to get ready in the bedroom and not the bathroom. Boooooooo

Someday these questions will be answered.

Snow Wife

Spelling - yes please

Ok we all know the UK English can be spelled different then the American English or US English.

I get it - trust me.

Some of it even makes sense. 

Moisturising instead of moisturizing - I get it... "rising"

Prince Charming likes to always point out how the US version is wrong of course he is mostly tongue and cheek.  Until I pull out the big gun.

Centre ? Eh? That cannot be read as Center but yet it is read that way.

So ok some don't even make sense and I just laugh.  It's fun just playing this game isn't it?

What words make sense to you and what doesn't?

Snow wife

Can you grab my....

This is one of my favourite conversations in our house and of course I egg it on because it is funny for me.

Conversation #1:
Prince Charming: Honey can you grab my jumper when you come down
Me: (grabbing red hoodie) handing red hoodie
PC: no the blue jumper
Me: you mean the cardigan?
PC: no the sweater
Me: why didn't you just ask for the blue sweater ;-)

See Jumper is a fleece pullover, sweater or hoodie.  Pick one! ha

Gotta love the UK English when you are American

Snow wife

Hot Hot Hot

I swear I can't believe no one has ever bought me a hot water bottle. I have one now for all the stomach/stone issues and it I fabulous!!

I cab sleep because it stays hot on you all night long!!

Long live the hot water bottle :-)

Driving Moment

Sometimes when I am driving I have that "Oh Shit" moment.  If you are not from England and don't normally drive on the "wrong" side of the road you understand what I am saying...

I actually turned left on red the other night and thought, "Oh My God - I am going to get a ticket!"  It was 11pm and honestly I never see a cop but it would have been my luck but I didn't. <phew>

I will be going to turn at an intersection and think, "Oh My God - What side am I turning onto?"

This is why I could never even have a drink and drive because I would most likely end up on the damn wrong side of the road!

Saying this I am so happy I can drive here and I have a license and didn't waste time or I would have shot myself if I couldn't drive.

Do you have driving tales? Awwww come on I know you do

Snow Wife

Entitled

This word drives me insane!

Benefits? Get what you are entitled too!

Accident? Get what you are entitled too!

How about quit thinking your entitled to a ton of shit and get a job. England pays benefits which are quite good so some people (not all!) know how to work the system.

No one is entitled to anything except to die eventually.

Snow Wife
The cynical one

No it's not like...

I swear this irks me more then anything ok not anything but enough to bitch about it on my blog.

Let's pretend I am a Buckeye (Ohio University Team) and I have on a shirt that says Go Buck Eyes!
(me in bold)
Where are you from?
Ohio
Buckeyes?
American College football
Oh its like rugby
No its not, the ball is smaller and totally different rules
Oh its like the same thing
*eyeroll*

I want a Cwors..
Coors Light? Just to be sure I understood correctly
Yes what else would I want?
Techincally Coors and Coors light are two different lagers. FYI

Sorry if some accents sounds like something different and not what you are actually saying especially the Scottish!

HAHA SO No its not like....

Would you like me to say oh England is like Wales? or Scotland? Oh man would people freak.

snow wife

Few Randoms

There are a few things/phrases that bug me.  Since I write this blog it will be about what I see as not so important to rant/bitch or just talk about.  I guess that's why I have this little piece of the interweb or tinternet.

YES I hate those two last words - LAZY.

Ok I cut right to the chase and I am throwing you right into the crap that bugs me and by all means is it NOT an exhaustive list.

1. A guy should never say,"Do you have anymore bog roll?" Seriously? Toilet paper is to long of a word?

2. I kinda like the phrase "pack it in" which means stop it already.  There is a commercial where a kid is yelling at her dad saying "pack it in, you're showing me up" It makes me want to grab whoever made the commercial and show them manners! If our dwarfs ever told one of us to "pack it in" oh man...

3. Using Facebook to make people ask you whats wrong and then never answer. LAME

4. The texting culture in England (limited to people I text) NEVER spelling HAVE they say hav - seriously is that "e" going to make or break you? There are tons of things that bug me in texting but that tops it!

Ok Ok This is just a touch but I can't get to fired up or what else can I talk about at a later date?

snow wife

Great British Summer

HA

Seriously I could leave it with HA.  Everyone always talks about the great British summer - I call BS.
April and March was nicer.

I need sun

I am bitching about the weather - must have lived here to long

I have more to say but I think I need a cup of tea to warm up and an umbrella because its friggin raining again!

snow wife

The Oompa Loompa look

Ladies and Girls - notice the oompa loompa look is NOT flattering or attractive.
Please step away from the orange tinted make up - NO ONE needs orange on their face - trust me.
Ask any man not a 12 year old boy.

While we are at it what is up with faces you guys are posing with in pictures?
The below are NOT attractive either - try smiling - I know crazy idea.

When has this made anyone look attractive? <- go on click to see how "attractive it all looks"

All teenagers should read an relate to these: http://teenagerposts.tumblr.com/http://teenagerposts.tumblr.com/


Just remember all photos taken will be able to be pulled back out for big graduations, weddings, christening ect... How would you feel if you were pursing your lips, hand like a gun on your chin, orange face and massive amount of eyebrows or no eyebrows like above? HA

Trust me I see some old photos and go," good god why did I ever do that."  I know everyone goes thru it but think - do I look attractive to anyone? If you are doing it for fun - then LIVE IT UP just don't go out like that lol

snow wife

Poorly Puppy

So our puppy LOVE water, he would run around in it all day if you let him.  We have had shit tons of rain which its like mini heaven for the furdwarf and of course he was bound to drink some of this water.  Say it with me Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww  It is not clean good water but some water that sits on god know what but puppy/dogs will be puppy/dogs and you can't change it.

Well it has upset the stomach, say it with me Funnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn - NOT.  Touch of diarrhea which is always fun to try and clean up (can you say spray hose?).  So I went to the grocery store looking for Pedialyte to ensure furdwarf was hydrated and of course it isn't sold here.  So I searched the baby isle looking for ANYTHING like this and there was nothing.  So I asked the pizza lady, who is awesome and super friendly and she said it is called Dioralyte BUT you have to get it at the pharmacy counter.

I tottle off to the pharmacy counter and ask for this stuff and it goes like this:
Me: Do you have dioralyte?
PharmAsst: Yes, it is a powder
Me: Great I would like some please
PA: Raspberry or Black Current
Me: oh it doesn't matter its for my puppy as I want to make sure he is hydrated
PA: Sorry we cant sell it to you
Me: What?
PA: we cant prescribe vet medicine
Me: I don't want a prescription, this is a kids drink and I have known my whole life that its ok for a dog to drink this as it restore electrolytes.
PA: I will have to check - hold on
Me: (rolling my eyes) ok
PA: Did a vet tell you it was ok
Me: yes in the states, this is common
PA: (asking pharmacist who is hidden) and says ok we can do this

All for a 2.39 quid drink - dumbest thing ever.  I was in the pet shop getting puppy food and talking to them about this and they said oh its crazy.  They wont sell you gauze with vaseline stuff if you say its for your dog because they don't do vet medicine.  So of course we all say yep for my kid or yep its for me.

So lame.

snow wife

B&R

Just let me bitch and rant!  Sometimes I want to miss things and not give a rats ass why England doesn't do it that way but I want to bitch.

You can't stop me - don't try.

I miss the drive thru bank - yes I do! Instead I have to fight to park in small parking spots like forever away to walk into the "high" street to go deposit a check into my bank. F that - I want pull up do other crap while I wait in line.  Don't go on and on about how England would never purpose build a drive thru bank or it would have to close others down. THAT IS NOT THE POINT.

I am not always looking for a solution, I just want to have a rant.  I miss things from the US and from how life as I have always known it so let me.  Try to understand it WAS my way of life and now I am kicked back to pioneer times (in MY mind at least).


I mean seriously I got stupidly excited when I saw a drive thru Starbucks because the only drive thru's are McDonalds and KFC - BLAH....

So while or shall I say whilst I know England doesn't do it BUT they should and just let me think this in my own little world.

One more example: Fiber Optic Internet I mean good god I have never had Internet speeds this slow in my life but its all "broadband" aka DSL because it uses the phone line.  The phone lines are 500 years old and they get "interference and noise" and it slows down during busy times. FFS come on, we are hosting the Olympics but we can't get fiber optics everywhere?

sorry I needed a B&R obviously.

snow wife

*NOT all things are bad in England and some are good but this is a B&R post so don't tell me to live in the moment lol

Oh no it happened...

Two things
1. I got a job - its a teenager job but it is a job none the less and it can prove I can work with the British.
2. I spoke some words I swore I never would.

<insert sigh here>

For 8.5 hours a day I have been speaking to folks passing by and chatting ect.. I have always said there are certain things I will never say like tea is not a meal and I still stick by that. Although I did say Nae Bother. Someone shoot me now!
I have had dreams about this one statement.  It sounds like Knee Bother which is No Bother but I said Nae! I actually gasped a little.

Up next was TA good god is it the acoplyspse? TA I don't like TA - I much prefer thank you but TA seems so lazy to me but I said it - yes I did.  What's next? Calling a tank top a vest? Oh the shame!

I don't want to be THAT American who uses British words because I am sure I sound like a right twat HA now that's a British word I love which means I sounds like an ass.

Let's hope I can get over this hurdle without other things sneaking into my vocab.  I have done well all these years but soon as you start to work with the actual public it goes to shit or shite as it is known here.

snow wife

I am not Italian but....

The British need to figure out what a Stromboli is because here it is all wrong.

I mean a Stromboli is "made with a square shaped pizza dough that can be topped with any pizza toppings and is then rolled into a log and baked."  You may have tomato sauce (NO not ketchup) on the side for dipping if you choose but the sauce doesn't belong on the Stromboli!

Go on check wikipedia as I quoted it above as well.

Now I am taking one example of a restaurant here that I have been too and I got excited for a Stromboli and then I read the description: 
Stromboli - 8.95Pepperoni on a mozzarella and tomato base.We'll add extra chillies if you like it hot.
What the heck? tomato base Oy Vey


This is what a Stromboli should look like:

I know I am a picky eater but I didn't make up what a Stromboli was, the British just adapted to be a pizza and call it a Stromboli because I can't tell the difference.  Then again I do like pizza but let's not get started on that subject ;-)

snow wife

We are those people....

We now those people - yes we are splitting an allotment with a friend.
Oh what's an allotment? According to wikipedia, "An allotment garden, often called simply an allotment, is a plot of land made available for individual, non-professional gardening."

Which means these have been around for donkey's years and look like random bits of "plots" put together by random fencing and anything else people can get their hands on. People build buildings and even keep chickens, horses (if its big enough) and anything else they want.  I really considered it like redneck country because it was so pieced together haha

Ours designated spot isn't this nice but gives you a general idea.  I will post before and after pictures once we get more done so you can see the actual change because right now its a bunch of wood, horse shit and wooden boxes = boring. 

The exciting part is Prince Charming is building a shed and a greenhouse so everything is kept there and not in our "yard".  We will get potatoes, green beans, broccoli, pumpkin, herbs, jalapeños, leeks and onions! 

So roll one spring! Let's hope to get some stuff in the ground for this year!

snow wife

Pub Mile?

Who walks a mile to a pub for a few drinks and a snack? Me

If you would have asked me 5 years ago if I would walk a mile to get a beer or two, I would have told you that you were insane.  I find us walking more and more to the pub since you DO NOT drive here after drinking - its taboo.  I find this fascinating since they drink WAY more in this country but really I don't know anyone that will drive after drinking.  Even PC will only drink 1.5 pints and then stop because he is driving.

I love it but it does make you plan which is a pain sometimes but after all this time you get used to it.  What's a quick 1 mile walk (15 minutes) to have a good time and not worry about killing someone?
It's nothing - try it!

snow wife

1852 Pioneer Times

My husband said something the other day that was pure crazy and I almost enquired about having him committed to a mental institute but I found out in the UK a spouse can't check another spouse in against their will *damn*.

Our power has decided to cut out every once in awhile especially when I use the dryer.  So  he says,
" Why don't you NOT use the dryer?"
after I got up from fainting I went on to explain that I know England can feel like 1852 pioneer times but I am a 21st century girl and I want to move forward.

Not using a dryer to me is like having separate taps or your washing machine in your kitchen or having form size fridges - oh wait we do.  There is only so far I can go with this living in pioneer times and not using a dryer isn't one of them.  I can't imagine with a puppy and children having wet towels hanging about and underwear on the radiators (that really aren't one right now).  OMG I see me re-doing laundry a lot with crap on the clean clothes.  Oh hang them outside? Duh hey didn't I think of that. Oh I did but I have a puppy who likes to jump up and pull it off and around the patio and on his pee.  I say no thanks.

So yeah let's skip the pioneer times - for pete's sake I have DSL!!!

So women of the 21st century I don't want a lecture on how I am hurting the environment by using a dryer because honestly it makes me happy ;-)

Remember: I am not just a wife
snow wife

Dog Fight

Where does your dog sleep? Your cat? You monkey ok ok whatever animal you have?

My cats and dog always slept with us and this was normal.  I never locked the dog in another room over night and I don't know anyone of my friends that did.

I am not talking potty training but a dog that can sleep thru the night and cuddle. 

So what side of the bed to you side on?

snow wife